if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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