worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
