idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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