My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Two words: blizzard sex
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
