Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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