Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
If i come over, it means nothing
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
