Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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