so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
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