Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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