All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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