I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Randomize
