if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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