there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Maybe he injected his testicle?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
