i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
