i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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