Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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