what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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