you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm having to shit out rocks
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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