forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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