Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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