weddingsv make me drug and hornr
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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