Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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