My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
