weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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