I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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