he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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