You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
