nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
How drunk are you?
Completed.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize