if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize