we're blogging at a bar
so that wasnt chicken after all
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
