I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
