her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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