She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
NoShamevember. You game?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
