So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
