Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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