Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
