Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
