This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
