When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
