Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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