I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Hello my rib-scented angel!
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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