my mouth tastes like poor choices
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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