I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I think I am morally bankrupt
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
