How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
