she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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