i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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