I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
