She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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