Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
