I love black thongs
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
