i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize